Life of recent

It's been a while that I am away from my blog....

I was so irony with my own decision sometimes....After I chosen pencen, frankly speaking, I was regret with it....Once I think that, I will be teacher for 30 years ....I wonder how could I survive with that.....But, think twice again, if not be teacher, what can I be? Thanks God, he is besides me and help me to analyse the situation, and now, I admit that, teacher will be my life long job for the rest of the years....weeee.............

I always tell him that how I thanks to God as He brings him to my life...Well, I just realised that I like to talk rubbish and not promise....I hurt him two days ago~and I am regret with what I did....

What is the purpose to love? what is the purpose to get married? If we are broken now, I don't think I will be upset...will you? His heart is peeling with the words I uttered.....He is quite sad with what I said....And this is the first time we had such a huge quarrel among us.....Just suddenly wonder why I will get in love?!

How torture it is to him....I wonder why I speak out all of that?! Thanks God, he is still finding time to talk to me nicely....I apologized to him...and promise to myself only, try my best not to hurt him anymore....

God, we are still weak at the elementary stage of our relationship..we still need more understanding among us and seeing the God's plan upon us, just like we are walking in God's plan..Everything is not by us, but by YOU only GOD.....

Ha...no doubt, I have the urge to get married.......to marry with the one I loved, to have the commitment in marriage and promise to each other and to GOD....But....sure, it's not by our plan, always remind myself...pray to God and rely on God to decide it....Let's God lead us in our relationship......

Thank you Lord....